When your separation or divorce process starts, you’re likely going to find that your self-esteem is shot. Rebuilding that self-esteem is crucial to successfully moving on after a breakup or divorce.
Moving on successfully means that you are okay not being in a relationship with your ex anymore. It may take months or even years to get there, but it’s a lot of work for some people. Some people can take it really hard and the shock of the divorce can be devastating. You need to learn on how to focus on the positive things, and learn how to appreciate what you have. You’ll feel much better about your life when you learn to think positively.
Don’t beat yourself up.
It’s not your fault, it’s not anyone’s fault, you might have just had a bad marriage, it’s so hard to tell what a marriage will be like until after the “I do’s”.
Don’t think about the past, focus on the future. You’ll want to replace any thoughts of doubt by stating something that you like about yourself, and keep telling yourself that everything will be okay.
Learn to use positive words to describe yourself like smart, beautiful, ambitious, and so on. Your image of yourself can effect your life in incredible ways.
To think positively, you need to think of things to encourage yourself. Use self-esteem building activities like talking to yourself in a mirror. Tell your reflection how you feel about yourself in a positive way. Make encouraging statements, and you’ll actually begin to feel better about yourself.
The first step to rebuilding your esteem after divorce or a breakup is to let go. You need to put the past in the past and leave it there. Start thinking about ways that you can improve the way you feel about yourself.
One of the best ways to start letting go of the past, is to get dressed up and go to your favorite restaurant and eat alone.
If you can go there by yourself and have dinner, then you know that you’ll be okay. If you feel extremely uncomfortable however, ask yourself why, and then tell yourself some encouraging statements so that you feel better about the situation, and accept being alone or single. No one will stare at you, no one will notice you, and at the end of the meal you will be much stronger.
You should also let go of any goal of feeling like you need to be perfect.
This will let you lighten up about the entire situation. No one’s perfect, but making yourself try to be will only make things worse.
This is when you need to tell yourself that you’re not perfect, but your perfectly fine with who you are.
You might need to make changes to stand on your own. Decide what you need to do to find yourself again, and then reach out. Your level of confidence will rise.
You should also try not to isolate yourself. You need to be around people in order not to let your self-esteem disappear. Your friends will help you through the divorce as well as a lot of other things.
Your friends and family should be the key to finding yourself and finding love after the breakup or divorce. You will find the courage to move on by finding comfort in your friends.